Now, I was diagnosed about 10 years ago with Asperger's syndrome, along with a grocery list of other things, that I may mention later. Some people have made the comment that they don't see how I have Asperger's. I appreciate this sentiment, but I am not sure why its made, like labeling myself as Asperger's is like I am saying I have leprosy. Some people have issues with labels, or as I call them diagnoses. Unfortunately in this society, if you do not seek help with issues and get a diagnoses, there is virtually no help at all, you are on your own. If you have issue with labels, that's your business, but really don't feel pity for me, or look down on me because I have been overly sensitive to the issues I have and I have worked very hard to not only help myself, but also those whom I love. I don't mind the label. My sons are Autistic, I wonder how they feel? Having diagnoses with Autism at an early age, and not ignoring the issue got them the help they needed early on.
An example, my first son, Paul at 1 year of age said a few words and was interactive in some ways. By two, he said no words and was almost non-interactive. He was in his own world and as my wife would say, we began to lose him. My wife and her years of experience with children and her keen insight and wisdom, immediately jumped on this change and we sought help (it was over a period of 6 months to a year). We did not waste time. Early intervention is crucial in some Autistic cases. We were told by “experts” that Paul would never talk. My wife and I, including some relatives immediately signed up for the earliest sign language classes available so we could teach Paul sign language and help him communicate. Little would anyone know that years later he would be a walking, talking 15 year old, who is 6' 2” and still growing, is on the honor roll and in advanced classes in high school. All this not only by prayer and love, but therapy and a constant vigilance of how could we help and understand him, by getting into “his world” and living it with him. Yes, there are social issues and he attends a class that is specifically addresses this which helps him be.... social. Imagine, if Clare and I, said to ourselves, “There is nothing wrong with Paul, he'll grow out of it.” How would that have helped him? Really it would have only helped us, and for him it would have been tragic.
So, my point is that a “label”, or rather a diagnoses, is not a mark of condemnation, weakness, faultiness or dehumanization, it is a tool or a vehicle to get help and to not only make your life better, but also the lives of those you love. Be willing to truly look at yourself, your behavior, and how it affects your family and society. Getting help could be the best thing for you, and I speak from years of experience.
Thus I have no issue being public and outright about who I am. Its not something to hide or be ashamed of. Yes, people may not understand. But really whose problem is that? I don't think its mine.
As I continue this blog, it may seem sometimes that I may rant, or I will wander through the history of my life or our marriage. I may address things in a very orderly and technical manner, or it will seem like I am writing my chaotic thoughts down just to get them out. If you are able to follow my writing and my thought process, I applaud you on your patience and interest.
Thanks for reading, to be continued....
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